I just found out that Madonna was tongue kissing Britney Spears and Christina Agilera on the MTV Video Music Awards. This is truly shocking!!! I mean, I didn't even know MTV still played music videos!!!!!
But beyond the shock of that profound revelation, I find that this entire incident is a perfect example of the decadance that has come to permeate every aspect of western civilization. Of course, I will have to tape this disgusting spectacle of wanton temptations of the flesh when they rerun it. Why, you ask?
Well, uh.... Er.... So that I may repeatedly review it, both in slow motion and freeze frame modes, and stare at it for hours at a time so that I may more fully immunize myself against the unholy effects of scantily clad females making out with one another.
Yes, it's a dirty job, but somebody has to do it.